“I’ve Had Better Games,

But All in All I Thought I Played Okay”

Match: 08 / 158

Won by 5 wkts

Team	Total
Milton CC	116
I. Howarth 4 - 28, J. Hoskins 3 - 9
FFTMCC	120 - 5
D. Edwards 54*, A. Morley 27

To be honest, I was only half looking forward to the game against Milton yesterday – I was really tired from painting our house and staying up too late watching Big Brother, plus I’ve been organizing Zac’s Kwickcricket tournament, which is a lot more work than you probably think. I was going to get to the game late anyway, and that never puts me in a great frame of mind, on top of which Milton are always hard to bowl at, especially their top order, and when you open the bowling like I do, you have to deal with that.

Me, with the Collins bros – Jenner left, JP right – we’re all Aussies y’know?

As it happened, I wasn’t late at all, even though I got fined for that at the pub later. But the match was just about to start when I got there, and then as soon as I walked onto the field, I had to start bowling, because Ian had lost the toss and we’d been sent in. In addition to which, there was a really fierce wind blowing right at my back, and it put me off a bit. I wasn’t getting a whole heap of swing because we were using one of those Kookaburra balls left over from last year, and I didn’t feel like I had much rhythm. But even so, I thought I did okay, six overs for only 18 runs, it was just a few half-trackers that got tonked by Wilby and their left-hander Stanley, whom I haven’t got out even once yet in four games against Milton. I beat the bat a few times, and once I thought I might have had an edge, but that was about it, and most of my slower balls seemed overpitched and didn’t really trouble the batsman. It was cold to start with bowling, so I wore my jumper, but then after a couple of overs, I took it off and ran it to the side of the field.

I tried keeping Claire amused whilst her ole man bored us with his batting.

JP at the other end, another Aussie, was on his debut, but likewise wasn’t having much luck. He bowled with good pace, but soon enough him and me were taken off and Nick Hebbes came on and made the breakthrough. Wilby top-edged a slower one to Dan in the covers, who took a catch running backwards. I was fielding pretty close to Dan at that point, at a kind of short mid-off, so I got a perfect view of the catch, and it was a good one. Dan doesn’t drop many. When Ian came on to bowl, I mainly stayed at mid-off, and short midwicket for the left-handers, but later in the game I switched across into the covers on the other side of the wicket, just in case the batsman skied one to me, which didn’t happen. I probably only had to field the ball about three times in the whole game, and it got a bit boring, just standing there in the wind, which didn’t let up the whole game, although apparently in the previous game against the Lemmings, it had been even worse.

Ben props the scorebox up, close to where I sat (whilst we batted).

Ian got their skipper Leon out for a duck after about three balls, then got the next guy to nick one through to Martin keeping wicket – or so we thought, but the umpire didn’t hear anything, and so we had to wait a while to get him, it was Ian again, and this time the nick was much louder and so he walked. I could tell even from where I was standing that Ian was bowling well, he beat the bat a lot, and hardly even bowled one at the batsman’s head, and ended up with 4 wickets, which made a big difference in the end. I was also fielding close when Jamo was bowling, right into the teeth of the gale, and he did it well, holding the ball up and using lots of variation. He took 3 wickets in the end, and with Adie Small chipping in for the last one, we managed to confine Milton to 116 all out, which was a big change from the game a few weeks ago when it was 214-5 and we got battered. Jenner, PJ’s brother, was also on debut, and took an amazing catch in the covers, diving to half-grab the ball as he fell, kind of palming it onto his chest, then rolling over and somehow finding it stuck in his hands. PJ close on the off-side took an important one too, to get rid of Stanley fairly early off Jamo’s bowling, though it looked for a second like the ball might not have carried. But Stanley walked off and we kind of figured it must have been out. Kind of.

Even though I didn’t take any wickets or catches, I thought I did okay in the field, the way I encouraged people to do well, and congratulated them, even if I was a bit tired and not fully focused. Anyhow, then we had tea, which isn’t great at Kidlington, not much better than what Kev used to offer up at Pembroke to be honest, and they use these kids to make it, and they get paid just a few quid. It’s like slave labour.

I enjoy umpiring sometimes – it’s a really good view of what’s going on.

After that it was our turn to bat and I didn’t need to look to know I’d be down at number eleven. It’s actually been a pretty good year with the bat for me, and with the ball, and I’ve taken quite a few catches, so I’m doing okay, but when you open the bowling like I usually do, you can’t expect to bat high up the order the whole time. I did a bit of umpiring first up and got to see Jenner up close, and he looked pretty good, hitting two sweet boundaries before getting out. Shame, because he seemed like he could get some runs. Dan was at the other end, playing very solidly, which was a good plan, because even though it was a low total to chase, we usually muck it up against Milton. We were all pretty keen to win this one, just to prove that we could beat them. Nick Hebbes and Martin went cheaply, though, which left us three down for not that many, and it looked like we might be getting the shakes, especially since Andy Morley was in next. I was sitting chatting with Dan’s wife Clare when he went in, and expected like everybody else that he would probably be out a couple of balls later. But it didn’t happen that way. Andy batted really well, clubbing the ball all round the ground. You could tell it was annoying Milton, because they thought they should get him out, but he just kept smacking these good-length deliveries for four. Three boundaries off one over he hit, and the guy bowling was really pissed off. Eventually, though, he missed one and got bowled, but by then, he was on 27, his highest ever score for the team, and he’d just about won the game for us. Though Dan did make 54 not out, which helped too.

I’m out of shot here, just some 20 metres to Andrew’s left.

Everyone was amazed by the way Andy batted, it was like, where did that come from? My own theory was that he’d given up the booze and gotten his crap together, and this was how he could really bat when he put his mind to it. But then I found out he’d been drinking vodka all day, so my theory was basically completely wrong. He actually batted well because he was utterly pissed.

Anyhow, we won the game, by five wickets. Even though I didn’t get a bat, I felt like I contributed to the win, though not hugely. I’ve had better games, but all in all I thought I played okay. After the game, we went back to the pub for a beer. After that, I went home and watched some telly, then went to bed. Maybe I read a book for a while, but maybe not. To be honest, I can’t remember.

‘Blocker’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far from the MCC versus Milton CC Played at Stratfield Brake, 29 June 2008 Milton CC won the toss and elected to bat Far from the MCC won by 5 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: Jenner Collins (101), JP Collins (102)

08 / 158 35 over match

Team	Milton CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	G. Wilby *	c Edwards b Hebbes	26				1-49
2	A. Stanley	c JP Collins b Hoskins	30				3-78
3	L. Houseman	b Howarth	0				2-51
4	G. Edward	c J Collins b Howarth	24				4-84
5	W. Fletcher	c Westmoreland b Howarth	9				6-90
6	C. Kinch	c & b Hoskins	0				5-90
7	G. Fletcher	not out	12				-
8	H. Wyn-Jones	c Westmoreland b Howarth	2				7-96
9	C. Houseman	b Hoskins	0				8-97
10	S. Wyn-Jones	b Small	4				9-116
11
	Extras	(W5, LB1, B3)	9
	TOTAL	(all out, 34.1 overs)	116

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	Mann	6	0	19	0
2	JP Collins	4	0	22	0
3	Hebbes	4	1	21	1
4	Howarth	8	0	28	4
5	Hoskins	8	4	9	3
6	Small	3.1	1	9	1
7	Edwards	1	0	4	0

Team	Far from the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	D. M. Edwards	not out	54	(97)	8	-	-
2	J. Collins	c b W. Fletcher	8	(7)	2	-	1-9
3	N. J. Hebbes	lbw b Houseman	6	(24)	1	-	2-22
4	M. T. Westmoreland +	c b Wilby	9	(12)	2	-	3-49
5	A. Morley	b G. Fletcher	27	(30)	5	-	4-97
6	B. J. Mander	b S. Wyn-Jones	1	(5)	-	-	5-106
7	J. P. Collins	not out	9	(13)	2	-	-
8	I. Howarth *
9	J. D. Hoskins
10	A. Small
11	A. G. Mann
	Extras	(NB1, W1, LB3, B1)	6
	TOTAL	(for 5 wickets, 31.1 overs)	120

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	W. Fletcher	7	3	17	1
2	C. Houseman	7	3	22	1
3	Wilby	5	0	14	1
4	L. Houseman	3	1	4	0
5	Kinch	2	0	22	0
6	S. Wyn-Jones	4	0	22	1
7	G. Fletcher	3.1	0	15	1

MOTM: A. Morley Champagne Moment: J. Collins’ amazing tumbling “iffy” catch Buffet Award: JP Collins’ kangaroo quiche (with onion sauce)

Opposition: V040 / 04 Ground: G032 / 04 Captain: C007 / 38

Match Fines