Far from the MCC fines 31.05.09 v Old East Oxford CC (h) won by 62 runs

Recorded Fines

25p unless otherwise stated.

Name	Fine	Reason	Cost
Morlers	Pen Avoidance
	Matrix Fielding	Slow motion
	3 x Fines Avoidance
	Backing-up Avoidance
			£1.50
Thorn	Smoking on the Pitch		£0.50
	Leaving the Pitch mid-game
	Requesting beer whilst on the Pitch	Impersonating a pisshead
	Michael Jackson (before he was dead) Fielding
	Cob
	Self-importance
	Wearing the wrong shirt	Wrong nickname
			£2.00
Stevie D	Duck
	Comment of 'no runs on this pitch'	Cementing his comment with a duck
	Comedy Fielding
			£1.00
Reevsie	Excessive Cycling / warming up
	Shrinking head / Pitt Rivers
			£0.50
Dan	Wearing I-pod	More interesting than listening to team
	Refusing to bowl
	Threatening to murder J-Mo		£1.00
	Drinking on the pitch
	Cob
	Impersonating Dick Turpin
	Impersonating an invalid
	Hogging the match
			£2.75
Dave E	Comedy Hat	Looking a twat
	Excessive warming up
	Smoking at 'drinks'
	Smoking on the pitch		£0.50
	Minor Cob x 2		£0.50
	Appeal avoidance
	Dropped Catch		£0.50
	Missed run-out		£0.50
			£3.00
Ian H	Major Cob	After his “shit lbw decision”	£1.00
	Fine entrapment
	Comedy fielding
	Mooing at Moo	Goading Moo
	Insulting Chairman of the Fines Committee	“You’re a fucking cock”
			£2.00
J-Mo	Buying a girls car	Porsche
	3 x Self Importance
	Impersonating A Fisher	Pie chucking
	Average Protection
			£1.50
Ade F	Celebrating Pie
	2 x Self-Importance		£0.50
	Falling off bar stool
			£1.00
Jake	Stripping	In front of ladies and children
	Impersonating a female umpire
	Feigning knee injury
	Fine entrapment	Giving beer
	Swapping beer
			£1.25
Moo	Losing the toss
	Lack of sympathy	For Jake’s injury
	Bowling avoidance	Yips
	Outscored by Dan	The sheer outrageousness of it!
	Failure to use all bowlers
	Incorrect catching technique	Utilising kneecap [instead of hands]
			£1.50
		TOTAL	£18.00

*

Special Rates

Indiscretion	Cost
Duck	£0.50
Golden Duck	£1.00
Diamond or Platinum Duck	£2.00
Out Playing Reverse-sweep / Switch-hit	£1.00
Dropped Catch	£0.50
Opening Bowler No Wicket	£0.50
Opening Partnership <25 Avoidance	£0.50
Smoking on the Pitch	£0.50
Drinking on the Pitch	£0.50
Missed Stumping	£0.50
Missed Run-Out	£0.50
Fines' Folder Abuse	£0.50
Impersonating Billy Liar	£0.50
Having a Major Cob	£0.50
Having a Parkinson’s Cob (utter meltdown)	£1.00
Uber [anything] – particularly arrogant, smug or condescending	£0.50
Extreme [anything] – particularly Frowning	£0.50
Insulting the Fines Committee Chairman	£1.00
Insolvency / Unemployment (maximum limit) Known as the “Dobner Clause”	£1.00
Swearing in Front of Kids	£2.50
Bringing the Club into Disrepute (Ruled on by the Captain)	£5.00
Dissent (to On-field Umpires)	£5.00
Mongoose Multiplier (out using Goose)	x2