Far from the MCC fines 18.04.10 v Horspath CC (a) lost by 126 runs

Recorded Fines

25p unless otherwise stated.

Name	Fine	Reason	Cost
James P	Trigger Finger	Unacceptable interpretation of LBW in the eyes of I. Howarth
	Average Protection	Not batting like he had been in nets
	Dropped Catch	Thought the ball was bigger than it was	50p
	Non-MAD Shirt	No-one’s thought of a nickname for him yet
	Dissing The Team	He thought we could play cricket
	Self-Importance	He thought he could play cricket
	Denial * 2	Denied previous 2 fines (see above)	50p
	No Ball Ignorance	Tried bowling whilst nose-to-nose with batsman
			£2.50
Nick	Duck	Thought it didn’t matter as long as it wasn’t golden	50p
	Dropped Catch	Thought he was catching an apple	50p
	Innumeracy	Can’t count to six
	Stray Dog Avoidance	He thought he could look after himself
	Bad Fielding Position	Was worried we wouldn’t  have a decent total to chase down
	Not Listening To Captain	See above
	Failure To Run	Was worried we might chase down the decent total he’d help create
	Self-Importance	See all of above
	Impersonating Cartoon Characters	Comic book fielding
			£2.75
Mike R	Impersonating Benny Hill	No handkerchief required
	Impersonating Tigger	Bouncy, bouncy!
	Dropped Catch	Was too busy bouncing	50p
	Buttering Bread	Better than margarine
			£1.25
Ian H	Amnesia	Thought his glory years had returned
	Faking Style	He thought we wouldn’t notice
	Faking Injury	Spent too long down south
	Mega Self-Importance	Still a northerner at heart
	Disrupting Captain’s Plans	Is jealous of his win ratio
	Self-Importance	Just to be sure
			£1.75
Jake	Missed Stumping	Nerve endings deadened due to kettle burns	50p
	Duck	Felt sorry for Nick	50p
	Apportioning Blame	Someone had to
	Blocking Pub Entrance	Shortest distance to bar
	Hair Denial	Is thinking of joining the Army
			£1.75
Dave E	Golden Duck	He always takes it to the limit	£1.00
	Cob Avoidance	Seemed quite pleased with himself
	Showing Responsibility	Not drinking anything before match
	Dismissal Prediction	We’d all have put money of it
	Comedy Fielding	Delirium tremors (see above)
	Self-Importance	Thinking he doesn’t need to drink
			£2.25
Andy M	Insolvency		£1.00
	Fraternising with Opposition	Choosing to live locally
	Comedy Fielding	Defying gravity
	Failure to Spot April Fool’s Joke
	Drinking Responsibly	Drinking beer only slightly weaker than wine
			£1.00
Dan	Dropped Catch	Everyone was doing it!	50p
	Comedy Fielding
	50 Avoidance
	42 Avoidance
	Heavy Sighing
			£1.50
Thorn	Duck		50p
	Ball Avoidance
	Dissing Bowlers
	Stating the Obvious
	Stating the Bleeding Obvious
	Ignoring the Voice of Reason
	Sarcasm	Or trying to be….
	Self-Importance
			£2.25
Ian L	Home Avoidance	Sleeping rough as per usual
	Gavel Avoidance
	Whites Avoidance
	Harley Avoidance
	Inability to Dress	Like a normal human being
	Impersonating a Variety of Characters From Fiction * 4		£1.00
	Lack of Self-Belief
			£2.50
Martin W	Using Team for Personal Gain
	Dropped Catch	Setting an example to the team….	50p
	Comedy Fielding
	Impersonating a Ballet Dancer
	Yips Avoidance	He didn’t bowl any balls on to his toes
	Pissing on Nick
	Under Bowling Our Best Spinner
	Arrogance
	Winning the Toss	…and advocating a tonking
			£2.50
		TOTAL	£22.00

*

Special Rates

Indiscretion	Cost
Duck	£0.50
Golden Duck	£1.00
Diamond or Platinum Duck	£2.00
Out Playing Reverse-sweep / Switch-hit	£1.00
Dropped Catch	£0.50
Opening Bowler No Wicket	£0.50
Opening Partnership Avoidance	£0.50
Smoking on the Pitch	£0.50
Drinking on the Pitch	£0.50
Missed Stumping	£0.50
Missed Run-Out	£0.50
Fines' Folder Abuse	£0.50
Impersonating Billy Liar	£0.50
Having a Major Cob	£0.50
Having a Parkinson’s Cob (utter meltdown)	£1.00
Looking Uber-Smug (overly arrogant and condescending)	£0.50
Extreme Frowning	£0.50
Insulting the Fines Committee Chairman	£0.50
Insolvency / Unemployment (maximum limit) Known as the “Dobner Clause”	£1.00
Swearing in Front of Kids	£2.50
Bringing the Club into Disrepute (Ruled on by the Captain)	£5.00
Dissent (to On-field Umpires)	£5.00
Mongoose Multiplier (out using Goose)	x2