“Shallow Ducks Out”

Match: 11 / 254

Lost by 62 runs

Team	Total
Tetsworth CC	181 - 3
J. Newman 1 - 22
FFTMCC	119 - 8
M. Westmoreland 59

The Far from the MCC’s previous visit to Tetsworth is now etched into MAD folklore. A wreath was laid after the conclusion of the match, 207 poppies to mark the margin of defeat. On that day the local villagers were treated to the delights of the West Indies’ Hylam Shallow, as he spanked our boys all over Oxfordshire during a quite astonishing innings of 182* retired bored. It wasn’t just the scoreboard that struggled that day, The MAD bowling corps suffered too – Messrs Howarth and Dobner still carry the scars, as do the local houses who lost roofing tiles and window panes.

Thankfully the team now regard that epochal day as fairly amusing – one to tell the kids, or any old pisshead who lends an ear in the pub. Although it had to be said, it did feel like returning to the scene of a crime some two years on. So what would 2011 bring…?

A new scoreboard, but memories remain….

A two year gap had seen Tetsworth say goodbye to their West Indian stars and open their arms to some local Asian players. The weather had changed too. Gone was the dreamy haze of summer to be replaced with leaden skies and a cold blustery wind. That wind soon carried rain, and after just 3 overs of Mad bowling the two teams traipsed off to the plastic cover of a smoking shed and adjoining pavilion. Sheltered from the elements, The MAD now started moaning in earnest as the pub opposite vanished from view as torrents of water splashed down the guttering and soaked the surrounding area. Indian summer? Do me a favour….

Pure magic. Cricket in the cold and damp….

The League season expiring the previous day, it was the sole reason that Tetsworth CC entertained the notion of ruining their pitch trying to play some cricket. As it was, the teams took an early tea break and agreed to reduce the match to some 30 overs aside with a quick turnaround inbetween. Naturally, the sun shone throughout the tea break, and as soon as the contestants returned to the field it clouded over once more and began to spit….

Miserable it was. Mr. Reeves tumbled in some slosh to pouch one off J. Newman (6-0-22-1), Mr. Emerson (4-0-21-0) gave up after sliding on his arse, Mr. Howarth (6-0-38-0) banished the demons of his past as he went for less than 34 per over, whilst Mr. Rundle (6-0-41-0) continued his search for that elusive MAD wicket as he probed around the puddle outside off. There was some occasional cheer however, with the rain relenting for a brief ten second period. Other slightly uplifting moments occurred when C. Roberts (5-0-32-1) bowled Tetsworth ringer Kinaugh (70) and when Dobner affected a run out after skimming the ball through 30 yards of pond life….

Edwards finds much to be happy about sat in the changing rooms….

With the heavens well and truly opening, the Tetsworth innings was declared closed on 181-3. At this point the pitch ceased looking like a ‘pitch’ and more resembled an Asian paddy field. Surely that was that it, right? No….

Having asked every single member of the team whether they wanted to open the batting, Skipper Westmoreland eventually gave up and dragged Mr. Edwards (8) out into the gathering gloom and swampland to begin The MAD reply. With no expectations and a season of personal misery behind him, Martin found conditions were perfectly suited for his brand of “I-couldn’t-give-a-fuck-I’m-giving-it-some-umpty” approach. To packed galleries hiding behind the patio windows of the clubhouse, Moo’s innings of 59 was punctuated with several tonks for four and a maximum to cow. It was carefree and cavalier, totally detached from the inner conundrum of anxiety and self-doubt so prevalent in recent times. How nice Moo should finally find a semblance of batting form with the season 35 games old and now about to finish….

Finally, Martin finds something to drink to after his first fifty of 2011.

Martin received able support from… nobody as Mr. Mellor made 9, Hotson 2, Dobner 8, Rundle 2, Howarth 1, Emerson 7, with Reeves (5*) and Roberts (8*) opting to protect their averages. Mr. Newman padded up, soaked up the rain, unbuckled his pads, and returned back to the changing rooms. 119-8 after 30 overs. A losing margin of 62 runs, yet a marked improvement over the previous hammering some 2 years ago.

The season is now over.

Finally.

And thank god for that.

Gentlemen, we can now return to our wives, girlfriends, pets, hobbies, pubs or whatever other activities should come calling over the autumnal and winter months. It has been a pleasure, and may we all combine to make it an equally enjoyable experience next season. Here’s to us and our final tally of 72 ducks for the season.

See you all at the AGM.

‘Spam’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far from the MCC versus Tetsworth CC Played at Tetsworth, 11 September 2011 Tetsworth CC won the toss and elected to bat Tetsworth CC won by 62 runs Far from the MCC debuts: none

11 / 254 30 over match

Team	Tetsworth CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	Rakesh	c Reeves b Newman-Robson	6		-	-	1-12
2	D. Ravishan +	run out (Dobner)	40		2	-	2-119
3	Kinaugh	b Roberts	70		4	3	3-133
4	C. Isaac	not out	32		3	-	-
5	B. Patel	not out	23		1	1	-
6	Nimesh
7	Koti
8	A. De Alwis
9	A. K. Marripalli
10	U. Ali
11	F. Eley *
	Extras	(W2, LB3, B5)	10
	TOTAL	(for 3 wickets, 29.1 overs)	181

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	Emerson	4	0	21	0
2	Newman	6	0	22	1
3	Howarth	6	0	38	0
4	Rundle	6	0	41	0
5	Roberts	5	0	32	1
6	Reeves	2.1	0	22	0

Team	Far from the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	D. M. Edwards	st Ravishan b Rakesh	8	(28)	1	-	1-32
2	M. T. Westmoreland *	st Ravishan b Rakesh	59	(60)	6	1	4-85
3	P. A. S. Mellor	c b Ali	9	(20)	-	-	2-56
4	J. C. W. Hotson	b Rakesh	2	(3)	-	-	3-82
5	S. L. P. Dobner +	b Nimesh	8	(30)	-	-	7-102
6	M. S. Rundle	c and b De Alwis	2	(5)	-	-	5-88
7	I. Howarth	b Nimesh	1	(6)	-	-	6-97
8	D. Emerson	c b De Alwis	7	(6)	-	-	8-104
9	M. K. Reeves	not out	5	(12)	-	-	-
10	C. D. Roberts	not out	8	(11)	-	-	-
11	J. Newman-Robson
	Extras	(NB1, W1, LB1, B7)	10
	TOTAL	(for 8 wickets, 30 overs)	119

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	Koti	4	0	11	0
2	Arun	3	1	14	0
3	Kinaugh	5	0	17	0
4	Rakesh	5	0	19	3
5	Omar	2	0	17	1
6	Nimesh	4	1	10	2
7	Aruna	6	1	15	2
8	Badresh	1	0	7	0

MOTM: M. T. Westmoreland Champagne Moment: S. L. P. Dobner’s direct run out Buffet Award: M. K. Reeves’ plum pudding (with custard)

Opposition: V045 / 03 Ground: G041 / 02 Captain: C011 / 62