“Happiness”
Match: 12 / 269
Lost by 4 Wkts
|
Team |
Total |
|
FFTMCC |
150 |
|
D.
Emerson 35, M. Bullock
30 |
|
|
|
|
|
Horspath CC |
151 - 6 |
|
M.
Reeves 2 - 20, D. Shorten
2 - 29 |
|
|
Pronounced Hayz-bru,
Happisburgh is a village and civil parish in North Norfolk which is slowly
slipping into the sea. Despite this rather alarming situation, it is
populated by the happiest people in the UK. It is a combination of three
factors: (1) they have a lighthouse like a stick of Fraggle Rock (2) there is
a total absence of crime in the area and (3) they never pronounce their P’s –
so you can never be “pissed off” if you live there.
There used to be a
road here… or so the locals told us. There have been many
famous visitors to Happisburgh over the past few centuries including J. M. W.
Turner (famous atmospheric impressionist), Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (inspired
to write the ‘Dancing Men’ Sherlock Holmes story), Sir Ernest Shackleton
(maverick Antarctic explorer), the Queen Mother (god bless her), Rolf Harris
(to record a special Christmas Show for Radio 2) and more recently (and more
importantly) the acclaimed Oxford cricket team the Far from the MCC.
The barely
mentioned red-striped lighthouse. So, how did our much
vaunted Oxfordonians find Hayz-bru? They were certainly impressed by the
idyllic countryside spotted with scores of tidy hay bales, the famous red
striped lighthouse surrounded by dreamy corn fields, the engaging locals and
excellent Hill House Inn with its rich history and excellent beer. But it was
the cricket that mattered and I’m happy to say that Happisburgh CC didn’t
disappoint with their warm hospitality and understanding of friendly cricket. Having accepted the
gauntlet of Captaincy whilst pissed the evening before, Mr. Reeves set the
tone for Tour by winning the toss and electing to lose. Under warm blue skies
peppered with little fluffy clouds, P. Mellor (17) and D. Emerson (35) opened
up with an excellent partnership of 53 in a little under 10 overs. It was
stirring stuff and for moments our travelling troupe dreamed of declarations
and having the local cricketers grovelling for mercy.
Mellor facing with the backdrop of the
church. Notwithstanding alcohol
fuelled imaginings, none of the above came to pass as the obligatory MAD
collapse now unfolded (D. Shorten’s (1) limp dismissal leaving the scoreboard
reading 59-3). Chairman Bullock has celebrated many a great tour, albeit his
enjoyment coming mostly off the field as opposed to on it, but here would be
markedly different. Exercising ghosts of the past, Matt (30) would cajole the
middle order (S. Dobner 13, M. Reeves 12) and smack one glorious six into an
adjoining wheat field. 111-6. A continued resurgence
from Westmoreland (11) and Edwards (14*) was deftly undermined by complete
incompetence at the other end. Hotson (1), Roberts (0) and Howarth (3)
failing to see The MAD bat out their allotted overs. Notable bowling
contributors would be P. Dennis (8-2-32-3) and young speedster M. Patworth
(8-0-24-1) as the hosts were set the nominal target of 151 for victory.
Howarth finally
contributes something by doing the scoring. The tea interval was a
lazy affair, with the tourists wondering if their hosts would ever re-join
them in the field. Happisburgh just has that nonchalant, unexacting pace of
life – if indeed pace is the correct terminology. Narrowly avoiding being
timed out, openers Jayalingham (15) and Andrews (7) saw off some leg side
shit from Howarth (4-0-18-0), before Roberts’ (6-2-15-1) deserved spell
netted him the wicket of the Sri Lankan. Things got even better for The MAD with
an inswinging exhibition from Dave Shorten (7-0-29-2), the happy builder
reducing the hosts to 46-3, with one ball removing P. Brown (0) by flummoxing
the laws of physics (a delivery now recognised as the ‘Ball of the
Millennium’). With Edwards (8-0-36-1) nipping Papworth (1) out lbw minutes
later, it appeared the tourists were maybe on a course for victory.
A warm day called
for plenty of hydration. At the back of
collective MAD conscience was the imposing sight of an extremely large gentleman
sat with his pads by the steps of the pavilion. A conservative estimate would
have put Mr. Catchpole in the taller-than-Bob category, but with muscles and
strength to match his impressive physique. He just sat there in the afternoon
sun, unflustered and with that unruffled, unperturbed manner that most
Hayz-bruites exhibit. But would his technique match that ominous build? The
answer to that question would come soon after Reeves (3.5-0-20-2) dislodged
both T. Carter (47) and M. Woolston (26). It’s doubtful S. Dobner
(2-0-12-0) even saw the ball as it flashed past his ears and slamming into a
garden fence, and it’s doubtful Westmoreland (2-0-19-0) expected anything
other than watch people scour a wheat field looking for the ball. What wasn’t
doubtful, was Mr. Catchpole’s (33*) copious ability to go with his not
inconsiderable size. Hats off to Hayz-bru for mostly keeping the big man on a
leash, unfortunately game over.
A local Amish boy
looks for the ball. Drinks and fines were
conducted at the Lighthouse Inn, a pub inferior to The Hill House Inn with its
defunct signal box and Sherlock Holmes memorabilia, but nonetheless, a pub is
a pub and it did for the team’s demands. With Usain Bolt defending his 200m
Olympic title in a staggering 19.32 seconds, Paddy Mellor defended his title
as bastard Fines Chairman with a similarly staggering £126.50. So in summation, a most
enjoyable beginning to the Norfolk Tour and our many thanks extend to the
guys of Happisburgh who played in just the right spirit to make it such a
memorable day.
‘Number Eleven’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far from the MCC versus Happisburgh
CC Played at Horspath, 9 August 2012 Far from the MCC won the toss and
elected to bat Happisburgh CC won by 4 wickets Far from the MCC debuts: none |
12 / 269 40 over match |
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|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from
the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
D. Emerson |
b Andrews |
35 |
(37) |
5 |
- |
2-53 |
|
2 |
P. A. S. Mellor + |
b Peck |
17 |
(21) |
2 |
- |
1-53 |
|
3 |
D. Shorten |
c Jeary b Peck |
1 |
(11) |
- |
- |
3-59 |
|
4 |
M. Bullock |
c Jeary b Papworth |
30 |
(42) |
3 |
1 |
6-111 |
|
5 |
S. L. P. Dobner |
c Carter b Dennis |
13 |
(20) |
2 |
- |
4-89 |
|
6 |
M. K. Reeves * |
c Carter b Dennis |
12 |
(15) |
- |
1 |
5-111 |
|
7 |
M. T. Westmoreland |
c Jayalingamb Dennis |
11 |
(22) |
1 |
- |
7-138 |
|
8 |
D. M. Edwards |
not out |
14 |
(28) |
- |
- |
- |
|
9 |
J. C. W. Hotson |
b Jayalingam |
1 |
(13) |
- |
- |
8-143 |
|
10 |
C. D. Roberts |
b Langford |
0 |
(5) |
- |
- |
9-145 |
|
11 |
I. Howarth |
b Jayalingam |
3 |
(3) |
- |
- |
10-150 |
|
|
Extras |
(NB2, W2, LB2, B7) |
13 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(all out, 35.5 overs) |
150 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Papworth |
8 |
0 |
24 |
1 |
|
|
2 |
Peck |
8 |
0 |
45 |
2 |
|
|
3 |
Andrews |
3 |
0 |
9 |
1 |
|
|
4 |
Chilvers |
4 |
0 |
15 |
0 |
|
|
5 |
Dennis |
8 |
2 |
32 |
3 |
|
|
6 |
Langford |
3 |
1 |
7 |
1 |
|
|
7 |
Jayalingham |
1.5 |
0 |
9 |
2 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Happisburgh CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
L. Jayalingam |
b Roberts |
15 |
|
2 |
- |
1-25 |
|
2 |
S. Andrews |
lbw b Shorten |
7 |
|
- |
- |
2-46 |
|
3 |
T. Carter |
c Westmoreland b Reeves |
47 |
|
4 |
2 |
6-120 |
|
4 |
P. Brown |
b Shorten |
0 |
|
- |
- |
3-46 |
|
5 |
N. Papworth |
lbw b Edwards |
1 |
|
- |
- |
4-47 |
|
6 |
M. Woolston |
c Shorten b Reeves |
26 |
|
1 |
1 |
5-103 |
|
7 |
W. Catchpole |
not out |
33 |
|
4 |
1 |
- |
|
8 |
D. Jeary + |
not out |
4 |
|
- |
- |
- |
|
9 |
J. Langford |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
P. Dennis * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
J. Chilvers |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W9, LB5, B4) |
18 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 6 wickets, 32.5 overs) |
151 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Howarth |
4 |
0 |
18 |
0 |
|
|
2 |
Roberts |
6 |
2 |
15 |
1 |
|
|
3 |
Shorten |
7 |
0 |
29 |
2 |
|
|
4 |
Edwards |
8 |
0 |
36 |
1 |
|
|
5 |
Westmoreland |
2 |
0 |
19 |
0 |
|
|
6 |
Reeves |
3.5 |
0 |
20 |
2 |
|
|
7 |
Dobner |
2 |
0 |
12 |
0 |
|
|
MOTM: M. Bullock Champagne Moment: D. Shorten’s ‘Ball of
the Millennium’ Buffet
Award: M. T. Westmoreland’s egg
salad (with Heinz salad cream) |
Opposition:
V070 / 01 Ground: G057 / 01 Captain: C017 / 05 |