“The Cherry Inspector’s Report”

Match: 14 / 316

Lost by 7 wkts

Team	Total
FFTMCC	113 - 5
I. Howarth 51*, R. Turner 25
Wootton & Boars Hill CC	116 - 3
J. Hoskins 3 - 27

First let me say, thank you to the two team Captains for inviting me to this delightful ground in the middle of rural Oxfordshire to witness yet another remarkable first in the history of FFTMCC. Oft have I been invited along to witness the workings of various Cherries down the rain sodden wickets but never thus far have I had the delight to witness a White Cherry.

It must be said that the White Cherry is a sure sign that a club has come into some handsome funds – otherwise the bog standard two for a penny Red ‘Kingfisher’ or ‘Horsey’ cherry is the preferred article for a Spring evenings T20. Not so at Boars Hill cricket ground where a substantial flurry of cash has granted them the funds to purchase some very professional T20 looking white balls.

Personally I found this to be a slightly crass way of putting off my favoured batsmen, especially considering the ball blended in splendidly with the white sightscreens at either end of the highly manicured bog of a pitch.

Said ball.

Also, said ball appeared to have some strange qualities and it was just the fifth ball of the over when the first of these qualities was witnessed. The white ball appeared to tempt batsmen down the leg side and then somehow deviate at a rather bizarre angle off the pad of said batsmen to dislodge the bails some four foot wide of leg stump.

Batsman after batsman appeared not to be able to pick up the vagrancies of the White Cherry until a certain I. Howarth managed to dispatch it to and over the boundary on a number of occasions. When asked after the match how he managed to pick out the white cherry from the white background he appeared somewhat surprised commenting “What white ball, the last white ball I saw was when I shot a 147 down Colours” or words to that effect.

Indeed upon interviewing the Home Team after they had battered The MAD into submission with successive boundaries I discovered a very interesting fact “Are you off your rocker Inspector”, “you need to go to Specsavers” and “This ain’t no buffet, Inspector” were comments fired at me when suggesting a White Cherry was even involved.

Even now as I write this report I am left wondering whether it did actually really happen. White Cherry, surely only in IPL?

‘The Cherry Inspector’