“Simultaneous International T20 Chefs”
Match: 14
/ 318
Won
by 7 wkts
|
Team |
Total |
|
Blewbury &
Upton CC |
110 - 9 |
|
T. Smith 2 - 1 |
|
|
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
111 - 3 |
|
J. Pearson 27*, M. Reeves
25* |
|
|
Five games into the
season, and the Far from the MCC were still seeking their first win. Five
days before the game, skipper D. Emerson wrote to his squad: “We won this
fixture last year, so, umm, we might win it this year(?)” After the usual
last-minute alterations to the team sheet, the available players battled
their way through Oxfordshire’s rush-hour traffic to mostly arrive at
Blewbury in time for the 6pm start, though C. Roberts was further delayed due
to localized flooding. As the simultaneous
international T20 between England and Sri Lanka got promptly underway, the
Blewbury team were notable mostly by their absence. Presumably they had
chosen to live here for its picturesqueness, rather than its proximity to
their workplaces.
Emerson (left) continues the fine record of MAD
coin toss losses. Useless tosser Emerson
called for the coin to land on its edge, and inevitably Blewbury elected to
bat. In a departure from convention, there would be a two over limit per bowler,
unless a bowler was unable to complete an over, either through injury or
ineptitude. D. Shorten (1-0-5-1)
immediately began making the ball move unprecedentedly, both in the air and
off the surprisingly unpredictable pitch, bagging an early scalp, before
being taking off for being too good. T. Smith (2-1-1-2) also caused mayhem,
and the batsmen to miscue their shots, notably with R. Turner deliberately
misjudging a catch in order to showboat, leaping backwards, landing with the
ball still firmly clasped in his hands, in a crumpled heap.
JMO and the ‘Power of Pie’. With Blewbury
stuttering, now was the time for the irregular bowlers to serve the buffet.
And what a feast it was! For entrées, N. Hill (2-0-14-0) served a delightful
trio of prawn vol-au-vents, smoked salmon on rye bread, and twice-baked
cheese soufflés. For the main, P. Mellor (2-0-24-1) cooked a delicious Beef
Wellington, with beetroot and caramelized red onion jus, and a pistachio and
cashew nut roast for the vegetarians. For dessert, Turner (1.5-0-11-1) also
went trio with chocolate brownies, raspberry cheesecake, and miniature apple
pies, with kumquat and caramel jus. At the regulation drinks
end, J. Hoskins (2-0-15-0) provided a fine selection of oak-aged sherries and
single malts, M. Reeves (2-0-14-1) and J. Pearson (2-0-10-1) produced vast
quantities of a 1968 Bordeaux and a 1979 Sancerre, before Roberts (2-0-10-1)
delivered a superlative selection of Italian coffees and French brandies. This was all too much
for the Blewbury batsmen, as they began projectile-vomiting cricket balls and
failed to go the distance. A Nelson+ would be The
Mad’s target, and they were hungry, having failed to think about dining
themselves.
Do not adjust
your eyes – this is a textbook P. Mellor cover drive! Mellor and Pearson set
about the task with gusto, Mellor (10) unleashing the full variety of
cover-drives, whilst public-schoolboy Pearson (27* ret’d)
hit two comprehensive maximums. Shorten (8) registered highest on the sixter scale before being predictably bowled next ball. Roberts (14) got close
to the no.11 record, but it wouldn’t have counted anyway as he was batting at
no.4. Reeves (25*) and Hoskins (6*) topped up their batting averages, there
were no collapses, and winning suddenly seemed easy. Meanwhile, the slackers
in the simultaneous international game were only just finishing their main
course, and in danger of the result not making first press.
When a man needs a leak…. + - Nelson is a piece of cricket slang terminology and
superstition. The name, applied to team or individual scores of 111 or
multiples thereof [known as double nelson, triple nelson, etc]. It is thought
to refer to Lord Nelson's lost eye, arm and leg; however, notably Nelson
actually had both of his legs intact, and the third missing body part is
mythical. Longtime cricket historian and scorer, Bill "Bearders"
Frindall once referred to it online as "one eye, one arm and one
etcetera", implying that Nelson's alleged third lost body part was
"something else", however this is equally mythical. Umpire David
Shepherd during a radio interview to mark his retirement explained it as
"One arm, one eye and one lump of sugar in his tea." But we
digress…. ‘Y. Ottolenghi’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far from the MCC versus Blewbury
& Upton CC Played at Blewbury Recreational
Ground, 20 May 2014 Blewbury & Upton CC won the toss
and elected to bat Far from the MCC won by 7 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: none |
14 / 318 20 over match |
|
Team |
Blewbury & Upton CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
B. Strange |
b Shorten |
4 |
(3) |
1 |
- |
1-4 |
|
2 |
D. Barlow |
c Hoskins b Smith |
0 |
(3) |
- |
- |
2-6 |
|
3 |
S. Rawlings |
c Turner b Smith |
1 |
(8) |
- |
- |
3-7 |
|
4 |
J. Hillier |
b Reeves |
2 |
(12) |
- |
- |
4-38 |
|
5 |
J. Fraser |
run out (Shorten) |
30 |
(24) |
5 |
- |
5-50 |
|
6 |
J. Kenny |
c Reeves b Pearson |
15 |
(14) |
1 |
- |
7-89 |
|
7 |
T. Wigley + |
b Mellor |
25 |
(12) |
2 |
2 |
6-85 |
|
8 |
B. Ray |
not out |
17 |
(16) |
2 |
- |
- |
|
9 |
K. Brown * |
c Reeves b Roberts |
7 |
(9) |
1 |
- |
8-105 |
|
10 |
N. Walter |
c Reeves b Turner |
0 |
(3) |
- |
- |
9-110 |
|
11 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W3, LB2, B4) |
9 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(all out, 16.5 overs) |
110 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Shorten |
1 |
0 |
5 |
1 |
|
|
2 |
Smith |
2 |
1 |
1 |
2 |
|
|
3 |
Hill |
2 |
0 |
14 |
0 |
|
|
4 |
Hoskins |
2 |
0 |
15 |
0 |
|
|
5 |
Reeves |
2 |
0 |
14 |
1 |
|
|
6 |
Mellor |
2 |
0 |
24 |
1 |
|
|
7 |
Pearson |
2 |
0 |
10 |
1 |
|
|
8 |
Roberts |
2 |
0 |
10 |
1 |
|
|
9 |
Turner |
1.5 |
0 |
11 |
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
P. A. S. Mellor |
c Wigley b Kenny |
10 |
(12) |
1 |
- |
1-16 |
|
2 |
J. W. Pearson |
retired |
27 |
(17) |
1 |
2 |
- |
|
3 |
D. Shorten |
b Rawlings |
8 |
(9) |
- |
1 |
2-31 |
|
4 |
C. D. Roberts |
b Brown |
14 |
(13) |
3 |
- |
3-85 |
|
5 |
M. K. Reeves |
not out |
25 |
(18) |
3 |
- |
- |
|
6 |
J. D. Hoskins |
not out |
6 |
(14) |
- |
- |
- |
|
7 |
J. C. W. Hotson + |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
8 |
T. P. W. Smith |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
D. Emerson * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
N. Hill |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
R. P. Turner |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(NB1, W4, LB3, B13) |
21 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 3 wickets, 13.5 overs) |
111 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Kenny |
2 |
0 |
9 |
1 |
|
|
2 |
Ray |
2 |
0 |
8 |
0 |
|
|
3 |
Rawlings |
2 |
0 |
16 |
1 |
|
|
4 |
Barlow |
2 |
0 |
27 |
0 |
|
|
5 |
Hillier |
2 |
0 |
14 |
0 |
|
|
6 |
Brown |
2 |
0 |
7 |
1 |
|
|
7 |
Fraser |
1 |
0 |
6 |
0 |
|
|
8 |
Walter |
0.5 |
0 |
8 |
0 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note: J.
W. Pearson retired on 73-2 |
||||||
|
MOTM: M. K. Reeves Champagne Moment: D. Shorten’s direct run
out from point Buffet
Award: P. A. S. Mellor’s doughnut
assortment (Sainsburys) |
Opposition:
V074 / 03 Ground: G063 / 02 Captain: C018 / 06 |