“Making
Drinks”
Match: 14 / 319
Lost by 65 runs
|
Team |
Total |
|
Harwell CC |
176 - 5 |
|
D.
Emerson 1 - 22 |
|
|
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
111 |
|
D.
Shorten 35*, I. Howarth
24 |
|
|
Tension was rife in the Far from the MCC ranks as Dave
Shorten and Dave Emerson inched the team towards their objective. “C’mon,”
shouted Newman, as he stood nervously by the scorer’s table waiting to bat.
“We can do this. WE CAN DO THIS!!!” he bellowed. “We can make the drinks break! C’MON!” To which end Emerson was then
caught off the fifth ball of the nineteenth over to leave debutant and
ex-Marlboroughite, Mark Shelley, to take up the challenge. This he did, as he
prodded and blocked his way to a richly deserved cup of watered down Tesco
Value cordial. “Well played, lads” voiced Skipper I. Howarth. “A superb
fucking effort. Batting out 20 overs on a benign pitch doing absolutely fuck
all against bowlers doing absolutely fuck all is a great achievement. Now,
heads down and we can still do this….”
Drinks. It
nearly never happened. Earlier in the day, a first successful coin toss by any
MAD Skipper in 2014, allowed Howarth the luxury of inviting the opposition in
to bat on a soft pudding of a pitch. The reasoning being quite simple: that
the curiously and unseasonably dry weather
would make the pitch a far better prospect batting second. Hopefully. Entrusted with the new ball, J. Newman (8-2-25-1) and
Mr. Shorten (8-0-29-0) bowled with their customary miserliness, with the
former nicking out R. Tanner for a duck (he walked to a catch behind – very
chivalrous of the fellow). Backed up by excellent spells of bowling from M.
Shelley (8-0-25-1) and Dave Emerson (8-3-22-1), it was just a shame the
bowlers were backed up by complete incompetence in the field. In total, The
MAD were assisted in dropping 7 catches by substitute Harwell fielders – kindly
(if that is the right word) filling a hole for an absent G. Carter. To be
fair to Geoff, or George, he / they said they’d be late – but to see him /
them quietly tiptoe out from the shadows just in time for tea took the piss. With solid contributions throughout the Harwell innings
(J. Head 36, A. Hussain 29*), it was Danial Emerson (6-0-43-1) and M. Reeves
(2-0-24-1) who copped much of the late over thrashing, the last 11 overs
realising 85 runs. Harwell CC finalising a highly respectable 176-5.
Passive
aggression at its best…. During the tea break, it was muted that maybe this
pitch was suitable for spin – or pie – depending on one’s descriptive nous
when concerning ‘village’ slow bowling. Perhaps. And if that were a correct
assumption, then The MAD’s decision to play eight seamers may have been a
mistake. The truth would out (and wouldn’t it just). Also muted during the tea interval was a complete
absence of cheese. This is unforgivable in vegetarian circles. On resumption, J. Pearson (0) declined the option of
registering his first Sunday run of 2014 – instead scooping the ball back to
a short mid-on. Oops. Geoff and George (6) followed soon after – their entire
input into the match occupying a mere 7 balls – closely followed by M. Rundle
(3), who somehow chipped spinner T. Webb’s first ball into the keeper’s
gloves. 32-3 (8.1 ov). Howarth was now joined at the crease by fellow MAD
senior, M. Reeves. “Mike, it’s doing nothing out here, other than staying low
on a few occasions. Just get forward, nothing stupid and we’ll see how we are
after 20 overs?” Mike acknowledged his Skipper’s sagely advice, before
watching agog as Howarth swung heartily for 24 before swinging past another
T. Webb pie. A brilliant example of application and resolve, Ian. (38-4 10.2
ov). With Reeves’ dismissal just 2 overs later, there was a real chance The
MAD would fail to see the drinks interval….
“Pad up, Dan
– for fuck sake. You know number eleven always gets a bat for The MAD.” Let’s go back to the start – post drinks (67-7 20ov)…. “…now, heads down and we can still do this” uttered
Howarth. No they couldn’t, not a chance, with M. Shelley (0) securing himself
membership to the much exalted Duck on
Debut club – a rich reward for finally swallowing his Marlborough pride*
and donning the colours of his once hated opposition. Mr Newman (9) offered
some grim resistance, whereas Danial Emerson (0) didn’t (the latter still
searching for his first MAD run). At that point things could have been overtly
underwhelming, would it not have been for D. Shorten’s cavalier return to
form, our posh builder smiting an impressive 35* from just 44 balls. A shame
then that he ran out of partners…. Sorry, Dave. MAD all out for A. Nelson+
and T. Webb with figures of 5-2-4-3…. Positives? We did make
drinks – and we did bat much better
thereafter. And as the (much maligned) football commentator John
Motson would tell you – “it’s a game of two halves.”
The sun sets on
more MAD misery. * - Mr. Shelley first played against The MAD (for the Marlborough
House) back on May 19, 2002. His MAD debut coming the small matter of 12
years and 6 days to that very day. + - (ahem, for
the second report in succession) Nelson is a piece of cricket slang
terminology and superstition. The name, applied to team or individual scores
of 111 or multiples thereof (known as double nelson, triple nelson, etc). It is
thought to refer to Lord Nelson’s lost eye, arm and leg; however, notably
Nelson actually had both of his legs intact, and the third missing body part
is mythical. Longtime cricket historian and scorer, Bill “Bearders” Frindall
once referred to it online as “one eye, one arm and one etcetera”, implying
that Nelson's alleged third lost body part was “something else”, however this
is equally mythical. Umpire David Shepherd during a radio interview to mark his
retirement explained it as “One arm, one eye and one lump of sugar in his
tea.” ‘John
Motson’
|
*
Statto
Scorecards
|
Far from the MCC versus Harwell CC Played at Harwell Industrial Business
Estate, 25 May 2014 Far from the MCC won the toss and
elected to field Harwell CC won by 65 runs Far from the MCC debuts:
Mark
Shelley (135) |
14 / 319 40 over match |
|
Team |
Harwell CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
R. Tanner + |
c Pearson b Newman-Robson |
0 |
(7) |
- |
- |
1-4 |
|
2 |
M. Davies |
b D. Emerson |
22 |
(48) |
3 |
- |
2-47 |
|
3 |
P. Eccleston |
c Shorten b Shelley |
29 |
(58) |
3 |
- |
3-69 |
|
4 |
C. Head |
c Smith b Reeves |
36 |
(64) |
5 |
- |
5-149 |
|
5 |
T. Read |
c Pearson b D.H. Emerson |
27 |
(37) |
2 |
- |
4-125 |
|
6 |
A. Hussain |
not out |
29 |
(18) |
4 |
- |
- |
|
7 |
S. Hawkes |
not out |
12 |
(10) |
1 |
2 |
- |
|
8 |
T. Webb * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
A. Braden |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
S. Boag |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
S. Pritchard |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(NB2, W12, LB2, B6) |
22 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 5 wickets, 40 overs) |
176 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Newman-Robson |
8 |
2 |
25 |
1 |
|
|
2 |
Shorten |
8 |
0 |
29 |
0 |
|
|
3 |
Shelley |
8 |
0 |
25 |
1 |
|
|
4 |
D. Emerson |
8 |
3 |
22 |
1 |
|
|
5 |
D. H.
Emerson |
6 |
0 |
43 |
1 |
|
|
6 |
Reeves |
2 |
0 |
24 |
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
J. W. Pearson + |
c Tanner b Pritchard |
0 |
(5) |
- |
- |
1-0 |
|
2 |
I. Howarth * |
b Webb |
24 |
(25) |
4 |
- |
4-38 |
|
3 |
G. Carter |
b Pritchard |
6 |
(7) |
1 |
- |
2-20 |
|
4 |
M. S. Rundle |
c Tanner b Webb |
3 |
(16) |
- |
- |
3-32 |
|
5 |
M. K. Reeves |
c Tanner b Webb |
8 |
(17) |
1 |
- |
5-43 |
|
6 |
D. Emerson |
c Davies b Hawkes |
12 |
(22) |
1 |
- |
7-66 |
|
7 |
T. P. W. Smith |
c Eccleston b Hawkes |
3 |
(17) |
- |
- |
6-49 |
|
8 |
D. Shorten |
not out |
35 |
(44) |
4 |
1 |
- |
|
9 |
M. W. Shelley |
c and b Braden |
0 |
(7) |
- |
- |
8-75 |
|
10 |
J. Newman-Robson |
c Davies b Webb |
9 |
(22) |
- |
- |
9-102 |
|
11 |
D. H. Emerson |
b Pritchard |
0 |
(5) |
- |
- |
10-111 |
|
|
Extras |
(NB2, W5, B4) |
11 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(all out, 30.5 overs) |
111 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Pritchard |
6.5 |
1 |
32 |
3 |
|
|
2 |
Boag |
8 |
0 |
34 |
0 |
|
|
3 |
Webb |
5 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
|
|
4 |
Braden |
6 |
1 |
16 |
1 |
|
|
5 |
Hawkes |
3 |
0 |
14 |
2 |
|
|
6 |
Hussain |
2 |
0 |
7 |
0 |
|
|
MOTM: D. Shorten Champagne Moment: D. Shorten’s maximum
over long on Buffet
Award: M. K. Reeves’ mixed buffet
selection (with extensive doughnuts) |
Opposition:
V069 / 04 Ground: G056 / 03 Captain: C007 / 51 |