“I’m Just Going Out to Field, I May Be Some Time”

Match: 16 / 378

Won by 36 runs

Team	Total
FFTMCC	179 - 7
L. Ainsworth 50, I. Howarth 38
Enstone CC	143
J. Pearson 2 - 10, G. Timms 2 - 32

Day 1

The Good Vessel MAD weighed anchor in Enstone Sound as a harsh wind blew across the landscape. The men are in good spirits after an opening victory against Cholsey although I have grave reservations about this trip. For one thing, as our provisions were bought ashore, I noticed that our kit bag has been significantly reduced in size. Whether we’ll be adequately catered for without twenty sets of bails and three pairs of left handed gloves is anyone’s guess. For another, Howarth seems woefully under prepared. His idea of a long sleeved jumper leads me to question his sanity. Myself, I am wearing every piece of clothing that quarter master Moo could provide me with and yet still this Antarctic wind cuts right through me.

Day 4

So we’ve set off on our quest. Captain Timms was the first to depart, heading out to ‘the middle’ with a knowledgeable native. He returned through the storm with some good / bad news. We’d won the toss but were going to bat, which wasn’t his wish. Their team is already depleted through hypothermia, which is going to put a terrible strain on the men. Saw an albatross this morning, which is a good sign.

Carter swings at a levitating ball.

Day 8

We lost Carter this morning (lbw 5.) Poor blighter had been suffering for some time until Pearson eventually put him out of his misery. Struck on the heel, what a terrible way to go.

Day 15

Luck has turned our way and we’re making good progress! Prior to the expedition, there had been much talk of our engine room, or lack thereof, but today Ainsworth (50), Turner (20), Howarth (38), and Pearson (25) all put in a grand effort. The terrain is heavy going to say the least with the ball sticking in the outfield, but the men seem content to run up and down, attempting to stave off snow blindness, whilst keeping the score board ticking over.

Howarth works one elegantly through the covers.

Day 19

Hotson (5) and Reeves (8) have both gone. Neither were up to the conditions and both perished quickly. Reeves’ last words were lost on the wind as he wandered aimlessly away from leg stump. We had to shoot some of the dogs this morning. One, Timms (20 n.o.) did at least wag its tail, so well done him. Matt, the expedition statistician has lost the tips of three fingers to frost bite. He was overcome and wandered out to ‘the middle’, only to wander back undefeated two balls later. My gosh, it’s a long way back up that last hill.

Reeves showcasing his new backward defensive.

Day 21

Little has been heard from two of our party, Newman and Roberts. Rumour has it that they’ve gone and joined the opposition. There were sightings of the pair, along with Timms, Reeves, Turner and others attempting to break some sort of ‘Judas record’. More fool them I say.

Day 26

Relief at last! After the longest 26 days of my life and having achieved 179 runs, we have at last made rendezvous with the main camp. The men are sorely depleted. It is said that Turner lost six stone during the outward journey, but then put it all back on in the space of 15 minutes. The news from Blighty is that Leicester are about to win the Premier League, which surely is a mistake. I’m sure that by the time we return the usual monopoly will be restored. I have severe reservations about the return journey, my god it’s actually hailing out there. It would be suicide to go out in this, but out we must go.

Joy at returning to main camp.

Day 28

Our opposition have taken to their task like a husky to seal blubber. Speke (58) and Forder (15) look quality and it’s going to take luck and / or skill to remove this pair.

Day 28 (afternoon)

Luck and / or skill we have. This afternoon Howarth looked to be done in. He fell forward with what seemed like his last gasp, however seconds later he came back up clutching a cricket ball! The men celebrated by breaking out the last of the champagne.

Day 32

Our two wayward Judas wanderers have returned. Newman (8-0-24-1) and Roberts (8-0-16-0) have certainly put in a shift for the team (and the opposition). Several of the men are really struggling with the conditions underfoot and make slow progress in the outfield, however one of our number (Pearson) has developed his own unique method for getting about. The chap simply slides over the ice as if he were on skates.

A view from the pavilion back into … uncricketing climbs.

Day 35

Progress has come to a halt due to ‘chalk’. Where it has come from or why it is here, no one knows for sure, but it is slowing progress markedly.

Day 63

Still we are afflicted by this chalk. I fear the men may freeze to death where they stand.

Day 64

Finally we are moving again, but the cold has really started to affect the men. Roberts, Bullock, Carter, Hotson, Turner and Pearson (twice) have all succumbed to frozen hands. This might be a record for an expedition of this type, but fortunately we still have plenty of rolling tobacco and it doesn’t seem to have affected morale. Some say it was an apparition, but others are sure they saw a Thornton Smith this afternoon. This man is no fool and returned to the warmth of a parked Saab after 30 seconds. No fool also is the scorer for Enstone, who after watching our scribe sitting outside, chilled to the bone for nearly three hours, decided that opening the fire escape to the club house and scoring from inside there was a better course of action. Lessons such as these can be the difference between life and death when it’s 40 below.

Scoring the old skool way: in the cold and rain.

Day 70

Hurrah, we’ve made it! A huge effort by Reeves (8-0-28-1), Timms (8-0-32-0), Pearson (3.4-1-10-2) and Howarth (4-0-17-0) finally saw us dispatch a depleted Enstone team. Congratulations to both teams who survived blizzards, hail, rain, rainy hail, haily rain and more blizzards, hail and rain to reach the promised land of a warm bar / car. Celebrations were literally muted, due to the bingo.

‘Reevsie’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far from the MCC versus Enstone CC Played at Enstone, 24 April 2016 Far from the MCC won the toss and elected to bat Far from the MCC won by 36 runs Far from the MCC debuts: none

16 / 378 40 over match

Team	Far from the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	G. Carter	lbw b Watts	5	(18)	-	-	1-13
2	L. G. Ainsworth	c Taylor b Anthony	50	(74)	3	1	3-106
3	R. P. Turner	lbw b Newton	20	(43)	1	-	2-56
4	I. Howarth	c Taylor b Watts	38	(36)	4	-	5-148
5	J. W. Pearson	c Taylor b Anthony	25	(23)	3	-	4-144
6	J. C. W. Hotson	b Watts	5	(11)	-	-	6-154
7	G. J. Timms *	not out	20	(18)	1	-	-
8	M. K. Reeves	b Speke	8	(16)	-	-	7-179
9	M. Bullock †	not out	0	(2)	-	-	-
10	J. Newman-Robson
11	C. D. Roberts
	Extras	NB1, W6, LB1	8
	TOTAL	(for 7 wickets, 40 overs)	179

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	Speke	8	3	16	1
2	Watts	8	1	28	3
3	Rouse	8	1	47	0
4	Newton	7	0	35	1
5	Anthony	6	0	34	2
6	Stewart	3	0	18	0

Team	Enstone CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	W. Speke *	c Turner b Timms	58		3	-
2	K. Anthony	c Howarth b Newman-Robson	12		-	-	1-32
3	F. Forder	b Reeves	15		1	-	2-73
4	P. Newton	retired hurt	0		-	-	-
5	J. Watts	run out (Ainsworth/Howarth)	30		-	-
6	D. Stewart	b Timms	0		-	-
7	A. Pemberton	b Pearson	1		-	-
8	J. Rouse	not out	16		-	-	-
9	W. Taylor †	b Pearson	0		-	-	7-143
10
11
	Extras	NB1, W5, LB3, B2	11
	TOTAL	(for 9 wickets, 29.4 overs)	143

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts
1	Newman-Robson	8	0	24	1
2	Roberts	8	0	16	0
3	Reeves	8	0	28	1
4	Timms	8	0	32	2
5	Pearson	3.4	1	10	2
6	Howarth	4	0	17	0

MOTM: L. G. Ainsworth Champagne Moment: I. Howarth’s tumbling catch in the gully Buffet Award: I. Howarth’s frozen ice-cream with frozen chocolate bits

Opposition: V073 / 06 Ground: G061 / 03 Captain: C022 / 40