“Isis get the Bumps”

Match: 21 / 535

Won by 76 runs

Team	Total
FFTMCC	174 - 9
I. Howarth 67, J. Pearson 38
Isis CC	98
M. Reeves 3 - 26, C. Roberts 2 - 8

So, what’s been happening in the news lately? Well, Prince Harry is still washing his dirty laundry in public, Covid has gone all Indian up north, Pep Guardiola still can’t give the Arabs a Champions League trophy, and … The MAD have WON a game of cricket. Yes, you heard that last bit correctly, so please don’t adjust the frequency setting on your radio.

After months of scraping ice off your car for those who weren’t furloughed or working from home (ahem), we were then treated to daily deluges in pub beer gardens as UK economy finally opened up. And then… just as Brentford finally got promoted through the play offs at the tenth time of asking, the sun came out.

I’m not saying the FFTMCC have turned into fairweather cricketers, but they have. They just can’t stand the cold, wet or windy days anymore, or even the cloudy days that threaten rain but never deliver. Or… even those unassuming days that aren’t that sunny, but just a tad indifferent. May Bank Holidays at Queens College Sports ground are different however, they are always sunny, and you can get as pissed as you want before/during or after the game as the Monday is there with a safety net.

Timms and Turner checking the Tap Social is open.

A win of the toss is obviously key to a keen cricketing strategy and … oh. Perhaps already addled, Isis elect to give The MAD first crack on a dryish deck, popping at one end and staying low at the other. A decision which looks rosy as Williams falls for his second consecutive duck. Game over… but not quite, after Cartwright (5) also falls to Blatchford (8-2-14-2), Fuselier Pearson (38) and Builder Shorten (24) repair things and look steady at the crease. That is until David becomes unsteady and falls to the last ball before drinks.

Howarth would then join James at the crease, and in the unaccustomed role of doing something useful (for once), helps take the score to 117 before the latter is finally trapped in front of his wood. An excellent innings by Pearson, a diligent rock with which the less patient within the team (read most) can moan, swish and slog around (which they normally do, badly).

Howarth discovers his bat can hit balls.

In a watershed moment, or perhaps a flash in a burnt and discoloured pan, Howarth (67) hits his first fifty since the Tour of Suffolk back in 1926. There is additionally a stoic run-a-ball 16 from Turner, 12 unbeaten sparklers from the wanton and carefree Timms, a well-orchestrated single from Emerson, some well-cooked poultry from Hoskins, a couple of meaty smears (4) from Roberts, and all to help combine for a total of 174-9 off 40 overs. Reeves didn’t much combine but did a fantastic job with the pen and ink (scorebook).

Tea is a very subdued affair due to an unsatisfying absence of flapjacks (Mike), but thankfully, with lockdown seemingly a distant memory, players could pop over to the far boundary of the pitch and join pissed onlookers cheering the iconic bumps races on the Thames. How heartening to hear the sound of teens laughing, screaming and actually… well, just having fun. And leaving discarded beer cans everywhere for the colleges to clear up.

After Mike decided he would do something other than scrawl letters and numbers all afternoon, the Isis reply got underway by humping him into a nearby tennis court and atop of a Salters steamer. However, Mike (5-1-26-3) is a wily old cayote seasoned performer these days, and after buffeting up, he nipped out 3 of the top 4 with that stock inswinging delivery of his. This was neatly accompanied by his signature twizzle-pirouette thingy he does in celebration, much like a child does when grandma tucks into her purse in a sweetshop.

The Isis innings never really recovered or found a gear after that, with Timms (6-2-14-2) and Roberts (4-0-8-2) snaring a couple apiece and the former catching an absolute blinder at slip. Not to be outdone, Bob’s Day was furtherly sent stratospheric with a superb run out (to keeper Turner) to have the sprawling Henry (27) short of his ground and lost in a cloud of dust.

With Timms’ entrusting all ten fielders with the ball, Wyatt (16*) would coax a muted Isis riposte, but all in vain as The MAD would record their first slice of green in 2021 and a very handy, nay gratifying 76 run victory at that.

On conclusion to the match, the two teams mingled in the fading light and helped themselves to Posh Builder’s swag of leftover crisps, party bubbles and liquor. Job done, it was off to the recently reopened White House / Tap Social pub to stumble open mouthed on the floor after discovering the draught cider prices….

‘Spam’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far from the MCC versus Isis CC Played at Queens College, 30 May 2021 Isis CC won the toss and elected to field Far from the MCC won by 76 runs Far from the MCC debuts: n/a

21 / 535 40 over match

Team	Far from the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	J. W. Pearson	lbw b Kella	38	(90)	5	-	4-117
2	C. T. J. Williams	c Todd b Blatchford	0	(4)	-	-	1-0
3	J. A. Cartwright	c Kella b Blatchford	5	(14)	1	-	2-8
4	D. Shorten	c Hyde b Wyatt	24	(37)	4	-	3-44
5	I. Howarth	b Wyatt	67	(61)	10	-	5-146
6	R. P. Turner †	b Walter	16	(17)	-	-	7-169
7	D. Emerson	c Bevan b Walter	1	(3)	-	-	6-147
8	G. J. Timms *	not out	12	(8)	2	-	-
9	C. D. Roberts	b Wyatt	4	(4)	-	-	8-174
10	J. D. Hoskins	b Wyatt	0	(2)	-	-	9-174
11	M. K. Reeves
	Extras	W4, LB2, B1	7
	TOTAL	(for 9 wickets, 40 overs)	174

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	Ponsford	8	3	27	0	3.38
2	Blatchford	8	2	14	2	1.75
3	Wyatt	8	0	41	4	5.13
4	Kella	8	0	36	1	4.50
5	Henry	5	0	32	0	6.40
6	Walter	3	0	21	2	7.00

Team	Isis CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	A. Bevan	b Reeves	7		1	-	2-20
2	R. Kella	lbw b Reeves	8		2	-	1-9
3	J. Walter	b Timms	7		1	-	5-55
4	D. Todd	b Reeves	2		-	-	3-22
5	D. Henry	run out (Roberts/Turner)	27		4	1	4-50
6	H. Stoneman	c Timms b Roberts	2		-	-	6-55
7	K. H. Whiter *	b Timms	0		-	-	7-57
8	N. H. R. Wyatt	not out	16		2	-	-
9	E. Hyde †	b Roberts	3		-	-	8-61
10	R. Blatchford	run out (Williams/Turner)	7		1	-	9-86
11	K. Ponsford	lbw b Cartwright	2		-	-	10-98
	Extras	W11, LB1, PEN5	17
	TOTAL	(all out, 38.1 overs)	98

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	Hoskins	8	4	11	0	1.38
2	Reeves	5	1	26	3	5.20
3	Emerson	3	0	14	0	4.67
4	Timms	6	2	14	2	2.33
5	Roberts	4	0	8	2	2.00
6	Williams	4	2	2	0	0.50
7	Shorten	3	1	4	0	1.33
8	Howarth	2	0	7	0	3.50
9	Cartwright	2.1	1	6	1	2.77
10	Pearson	1	1	0	0	0.00

MOTM: I. Howarth Champagne Moment: C. D. Roberts & R. P. Turner run out Buffet Award: M. K. Reeves’ overcooked flapjacks (cheap ingredients) MAD Moment: R. P. Turner’s dismissal playing the reverse sweep

Opposition: V009 / 36 Ground: G008 / 18 Captain: C022 / 104 Match No: 40 / 141