Far from the MCC fines 06.08.06 v The Nomads (h) lost by 96 runs

Recorded Fines

25p unless otherwise stated.

Name	Fine	Reason	Cost
Adrian S	Records Avoidance	Failed longest run of innings without being all out
	Introduction Avoidance	Roger Hargreaves (Mr Small)
			£0.50
Martin	Jug Avoidance	Scoring 10 not 100
	Pitch Avoidance	Worst wicket-taking ball, above waist height
			£0.50
Andy C	Umpiring Incompetence	Not signalling, or signalling with hands in pockets
	Self Importance	Insisting on fielding at gulley
	Impersonating Anthony Edwards	Goose
	Knocking-In Avoidance	New bat was not knocked in
	Falling Asleep During Game
	Using the Field as an Armchair
	Grumbling	About lack of drinks
	Moping
			£2.00
Dave	Self Importance	Claimed giving team total to chase
	Hero To Zero
	Impersonating Lance Klusener	With 26lb bat
	Opening Bowler No Wicket		£0.50
	Duck		£0.50
	Dissing The Team	"Unfortunate that we couldn't bat"
			£2.00
Jake	Swimming Pool Diving	Impersonating a Dolphin in the field
	Scorebook Abuse	Knocking beer over on scorebook
	Impersonating Kurt Cobain	In a coffin
	Suicidal Running	Getting self run out
	Pen Avoidance	Using comedy pen with fluffy ladybird
	Suicidal Running	Trying to run Gary out
			£1.50
Ian	Captaincy Incompetence	Selecting 12 players
	Bowling Avoidance	Telling Ant to warm up then not bowling him
	Self Importance	Having 3 elbows
	Feigning Injury	Retiring hurt
	Fine Entrapment	Preventing Gary's 50
	Losing The Toss
	Losing a Lucky Coin	Lucky 2p
	Poor Field Placement
	Tossing an Unlucky Coin	Unlucky 50p
	Stirring an Ant's Nest	Held responsible for swarms of flying ants
	Captaincy Incompetence	Told Nick he was playing, then not, then asked if could play
	Impersonating Geoff Boycott	Spitting on coin
			£3.00
Mike R	Average Protection	Being not out
	Run Avoidance	Not running when called
	Sportswear Avoidance	Wearing Marlborough shirt
			£0.75
Matt	Grumbling	About fielding at long-on both ends
	Photography Avoidance	Not bringing camera
	Slow Scoring	Impersonating Geoff Boycott
	Impersonating Monty Panesar	Not seeing ball
			£1.00
Gary	Self Importance	Disputing umpire's decision turning down stumping appeal
	Abusing a Team Mate	Taking skipper's elbow out with on-drive
	Hat Avoidance	Wearing orange cap (and gloves)
	Impersonating Chris Broad	Feigning to smash stumps when out
	Jug Avoidance	Out for 47
			£1.25
Ant	Harbouring Dark Thoughts
	Slow Scoring	As 'pinch-hitter'
	Opening Bowler No Wicket
			£0.75
Dan	Duck		£0.50
	Opening Partnership Avoidance		£0.50
	Self Importance	Calling for gavel on own fines
			£1.25
		TOTAL	£14.50

*

Special Rates

Indiscretion	Cost
Duck	£0.50
Golden Duck	£1.00
Diamond or Platinum Duck	£2.00
Out Playing Reverse-sweep / Switch-hit	£1.00
Dropped Catch	£0.50
Opening Bowler No Wicket	£0.50
Opening Partnership <25 Avoidance	£0.50
Smoking on the Pitch	£0.50
Drinking on the Pitch	£0.50
Missed Stumping	£0.50
Missed Run-Out	£0.50
Fines' Folder Abuse	£0.50
Impersonating Billy Liar	£0.50
Having a Major Cob	£0.50
Having a Parkinson’s Cob (utter meltdown)	£1.00
Uber [anything] – particularly arrogant, smug or condescending	£0.50
Extreme [anything] – particularly Frowning	£0.50
Insulting the Fines Committee Chairman	£1.00
Insolvency / Unemployment (maximum limit) Known as the “Dobner Clause”	£1.00
Swearing in Front of Kids	£2.50
Bringing the Club into Disrepute (Ruled on by the Captain)	£5.00
Dissent (to On-field Umpires)	£5.00
Mongoose Multiplier (out using Goose)	x2