“Madsters
and Englishmen Come Out in the Midday Sun”
Match: 06
/ 125
Lost
by 4 wkts
|
Team |
Total |
|
FFTMCC |
127 - 7 |
|
D. Edwards 32, S. Parkinson 17 |
|
|
|
|
|
Lemmings |
128 - 6 |
|
A. Mann 2 - 15, J. Hoskins
1 - 12 |
|
|
Weather: Clammy, with
cloud cover and occasional sun, thankfully no localised ‘showers’ in the
square leg area while Ian was umpiring…. Attendance: At least 4, including the welcome introduction of 2 x posh
totty at ringside. What a difference a
couple of weeks make. Following a series of abject performances, and with self-confidence
ebbing away, the tonic provided by the previous week’s humbling of the mighty
Hanney CC brought about a sense of expectation as The MAD welcomed back the
Green Army; the almost mythical Lemmings CC.
J. Hoskins (front) sporting The MAD’s
pyjama 1-day attire. The unsociably early
start, due to the 16:00 KO of England’s dreadful World Cup match against
Ecuador*, failed to dampen enthusiasm with all players arriving on time,
including to everyone’s surprise, that godfather of time-management, J.
Hotson. The Lemmings, demonstrating the self-confidence that a first class
education imbues, decided that they had adequate talent to take the field
with 8 men after losing the toss. The under resourced fielding side were
weakened further with the temporary addition of loaned Madster,
T.Smith to their ranks. The MADsters
having won the toss opened with the Good Cop / Bad Cop combination of the ever steady D. Edwards and the social hand-grenade that is
S. Dobner. Against as good an opening bowling attack as we are likely to face
this season, steady progress was made before Dobenaar’s
(5) defences were breached by a fine delivery from the impressive Baker.
Technically the bowler cheated as he combined pace, swing and straightness in
one delivery.
The MAD watch on as the foundations are laid for a slogathon. A buzz of expectation
went around the ground as last week’s centurion M. Westmoreland approached
the wicket. Could our hero repeat his previous effort and really put pressure
on The Lemmings? Looking confident, Martin stroked and bludgeoned his way to
a promising 9, before being undone by gremlins in the pitch (Gremlins and
Lemmings being a potent combination) and was bowled by what used to be known
as a pea roller. ‘Tis a great leveller this
game of cricket. This unfortunate
dismissal brought N. Hebbes out of dry dock, and a further 40 was added in
partnership with The Grinder before Dan (32) succumbed to a caught and bowled
having been encouraged by the skipper to “get a fucking move on”. With a need
to accelerate as the overs flew by, A. Cavanagh was sent in and with a solemn
vow to be nobody’s bitch he set about the bowling, taking a particular liking
to McKechnie’s off spin. Just as the partnership was starting to bear fruit,
Titanick was fatally holed below the waterline. His hard run first had turned
an easy one into a very gettable second, unfortunately for Nick, QC had other
thoughts as he farted around with a twisted pad, and Nick (11) was left
stranded in mid pitch – real tough on a guy searching for form and a bit of
luck. I. Howarth (6) shone far too briefly, and QC then departed for 15. And
despite being offered a life after being called back for a mix up over an lbw
(I know where you live Dobner!!) S. Parkinson (17) joined the ranks of
players who got a start but failed to push on.
“This makes grim fucking reading.” It was all left to M.
Bullock (15*) and T. Smith (9*) to flail away in their very enterprising
unbeaten 8th wicket partnership that saw The MAD total 127-7, as
the ball was smite to all corners of the ground. As a bowler nothing is more
dispiriting than being despatched to the fence by a smiling, Ray Ban wearing
assassin. We all felt that while a sporting total, it was probably 20 or 30
runs short of being really challenging for opponents of this calibre. However
we have seen stranger things this season, and maybe Kev’s triumphant seafood
cocktail sarnies could once again spark panic in the visitor’s ranks? Tea. The MAD took the field,
knowing that in A. Mann they had a bowler who had rediscovered the knack of
taking wickets, and with the ball hooping around it would surely suit the
wily Aussie’s style. A very tight start from both ends certainly unsettled
the Lemmings’ opening pair and it was no surprise when The Ant (5-1-15-2)
snared Hull and Jones relatively cheaply, whilst the luckless S. Parkinson
went wicketless. The MAD fielders
honestly looked like they sensed the chance of an upset in this
reduced overs format, and the energy levels were impressive.
Enthusiasm in the field was typified by the sterling efforts of former
skipper, and substitute J. Hoskins, bounding barefoot around the outfield
like a post-op Zola Budd on speed. Here is a man who will run through fences
for his team! Also the fearless efforts of Jake, who donated a finger nail to
the cause, should not be forgotten.
Dinner and back to JMO’s house The Lemmings middle
order, however, responded in the way that quality players do. Good batting
from McKechnie, J Greaney and a mysterious silver haired pensioner (rumoured
to be Pappa Lemming) changed the complexion of the game. Despite the regular
fall of wickets, which were shared around between Martin (5-0-14-1), Nick
(3-0-20-1), Ian (3-0-27-1) and James (1.2-0-12-1), the game slipped away from
us. Hell, Dan even took another slip catch! But the Lemmings sealed victory
by 4 wickets with a couple of overs in hand. Highlight of the
Lemmings innings was a difference of opinion concerning a ‘capricious’ lbw
decision, which resulted in a two minute standoff between player and umpire
during which the view was proffered that the umpire was quote ‘a twat’. In these
days of social inequality it is pleasing to see that be you public school or
local comp, Oxbridge or FE college, a dodgy lbw decision from your own umpire
can still be greeted with such a blunt assessment of the perpetrator’s
character….
England’s win over the mighty Ecuador
gets the thumbs up. Overall a performance
that spoke of greater things to come and had the early chances stuck, we
could be talking about a famous victory. However the past couple of weeks
have shown that as a group we have the ability to compete with anyone and we
have a golden opportunity to gain revenge on our old friends from The Offices
this coming Sunday. * - England beat Ecuador 1-0 in a match that forced the
early start to the reduced-overs Lemmings encounter. ‘Hoskers’
|
*
Statto
Scorecards
|
Far from the MCC versus Lemmings Played at Pembroke College, 25 June
2006 Far from the MCC won the toss and
elected to bat Lemmings won by 4 wkts Far from the MCC debuts:
none |
06 / 125 30 over match |
|
Team |
Far from
the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
D. M. Edwards |
c and b Bell |
32 |
(48) |
5 |
- |
3-60 |
|
2 |
S. L. P. Dobner |
b Baker |
5 |
(11) |
1 |
- |
1-6 |
|
3 |
M. T. Westmoreland |
b R. Greany |
9 |
(20) |
1 |
- |
2-20 |
|
4 |
N. J. Hebbes |
run out |
11 |
(30) |
1 |
- |
4-69 |
|
5 |
A. Cavanagh |
lbw b Hukins |
15 |
(26) |
1 |
- |
6-93 |
|
6 |
I. Howarth * |
b Hukins |
6 |
(7) |
1 |
- |
5-76 |
|
7 |
S. B. Parkinson |
b Bell |
15 |
(11) |
4 |
- |
7-99 |
|
8 |
M. Bullock + |
not out |
15 |
(12) |
1 |
- |
- |
|
9 |
T. P. W. Smith |
not out |
9 |
(15) |
1 |
- |
- |
|
10 |
J. D. Hoskins |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
A. G. Mann |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W3, LB3, B2) |
8 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 7 wickets, 30 overs) |
127 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
R. Greany |
5 |
1 |
11 |
1 |
|
|
2 |
Baker |
5 |
1 |
17 |
1 |
|
|
3 |
Hull |
5 |
1 |
14 |
0 |
|
|
4 |
McKechnie |
5 |
0 |
33 |
0 |
|
|
5 |
Bell |
5 |
0 |
36 |
2 |
|
|
6 |
Hukins |
5 |
0 |
9 |
2 |
|
|
Team |
Lemmings |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
J. Hull |
lbw b Mann |
8 |
|
|
|
2-19 |
|
2 |
P. Jones |
c Howarth b Mann |
4 |
|
|
|
1-10 |
|
3 |
G. McKechnie |
c Edwards b Westmoreland |
35 |
|
|
|
|
|
4 |
T. Wood + |
c Howarth b Hebbes |
12 |
|
|
|
3-54 |
|
5 |
R. Greany * |
b Howarth |
21 |
|
|
|
|
|
6 |
J. Greany |
lbw b Hoskins |
25 |
|
|
|
|
|
7 |
G. Hukins |
not out |
3 |
|
|
|
- |
|
8 |
S. Bell |
not out |
1 |
|
|
|
- |
|
9 |
P. Baker |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W2, B17) |
19 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 6 wickets, 25.2 overs) |
128 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
|
1 |
Parkinson |
5 |
0 |
13 |
0 |
|
|
2 |
Mann |
5 |
1 |
15 |
2 |
|
|
3 |
Dobner |
3 |
0 |
16 |
0 |
|
|
4 |
Hebbes |
3 |
0 |
20 |
1 |
|
|
5 |
Westmoreland |
5 |
0 |
14 |
1 |
|
|
6 |
Howarth |
3 |
0 |
27 |
1 |
|
|
7 |
Hoskins |
1.2 |
0 |
12 |
1 |
|
|
MOTM: n/a Champagne Moment: n/a Buffet
Award: I. Howarth & J. D. Hoskins’
rump steaks (with relish) |
Opposition:
V024 / 06 Ground: G011 / 38 Captain: C007 / 12 |