Far from the MCC fines 04.06.06 v Oxford University Offices (a) lost by 7 wkts

Recorded Fines

25p unless otherwise stated.

Name	Fine	Reason	Cost
Steve D	Feigning Injury	Migraine
	Dissent	When smacked for four
	Comedy Fielding	Crashing into concrete shed off pitch
	Dissent	When run out
	Feigning Injury	Before match
	Expecting a Child on a Match Day
			£1.50
Martin	Impersonating Boris Johnson	Rugby-tackling Steve
	Attempting to Bankrupt The Club	Practicing on Vodafone with £28m losses
	Abusing a Team Mate	Making Andy cry having to take catch for dismissal
	Sportswear Avoidance	Kit avoidance
	Dissent
	Self Importance	Hogging the game in the field
			£1.50
Steve P	Hat Theft	Attempted, calling for hat in field when only 3 runs needed
	Opening Bowler No Wicket		£0.50
	Communication Avoidance	Driving from Cholsey whilst neighbour Nick took train
	Bat Abuse
	Dissent	Poor quality cob
			£1.50
Andy C	Introduction Avoidance	Not introducing girlfriend, leading to Thornton's flirtation
	Sportswear Avoidance	Whites
	Dropped Catch	Despite playing for opposition	£0.50
	Impersonating a Wimp	Crying having to take catches to dismiss team mates
	Smoking on the Pitch		£0.50
	Average Protection	Playing for opposition
	Abusing a Team Mate	Making Martin cry by taking catch to dismiss
	Muzzle Avoidance	Shouting abuse at regular team-mates in field
	Impersonating a Sailor	Turning up jeans
	Abusing a Team Mate	Making Ant cry by taking catch to dismiss
			£3.00
Jake	Duck		£0.50
	Swapping Shirts with a Spectator	'Jakesville' t-shirt
	Impersonating a Tramp	Dirty fingernails
	Impersonating a Tramp	Nicotine stains on finger
	Abusing a Team Mate	Making Andy cry about excessive fines
			£1.50
Ian	Captaincy Avoidance	Insufficient vociferousness in field
	Impersonating Tinkerman	Kept changing field only for ball to go where fielder moved from
	Inappropriate Urination
	Inappropriate Flirting	Calling Thornton 'babe'
	Bowling Avoidance	Taking Martin off and stealing his wicket
			£1.25
Nick	Communication Avoidance	Taking train from Cholsey whilst neighbour Steve drove
	Dissent
	Opening Partnership Avoidance		£0.50
	Dissing The Team	Dissing self
			£1.25
Thornton	Drinking On The Pitch		£0.50
	Dissent	After asking motorist to push-start van in traffic jam and receiving response, "Sorry, I'm in a hurry."
	Inappropriate Flirting	With Andy's girlfriend
	Dissent
	Inappropriate Flirting	Being called 'babe' by Ian
	Smoking on the Pitch		£0.50
			£2.00
James H	Impersonating an Alcoholic	Opposition thought he was drunk
	Comedy Appealing
	Inappropriate Urination
	Dissent
	Impersonating a Clown	Falling off bike
			£1.25
Matt	Comedy Fielding	Slipping over
	Dropped Catch		£0.50
			£0.75
Gary	Dropped Catch		£0.50
	Comedy Fielding	Slipping over
			£0.75
Ant	Average Protection Avoidance	Not batting overs out
	Bullying a Small Child	Own son
	Dissent	About fines
	Bullying a Small Child	Wearing own son as an anklet
	Dissent	About state of wet ball
	Harbouring Dark Thoughts
	Abusing a Team Mate	Making Andy cry having to take catch for dismissal
			£1.75
		TOTAL	£18.00

*

Special Rates

Indiscretion	Cost
Duck	£0.50
Golden Duck	£1.00
Diamond or Platinum Duck	£2.00
Out Playing Reverse-sweep / Switch-hit	£1.00
Dropped Catch	£0.50
Opening Bowler No Wicket	£0.50
Opening Partnership <25 Avoidance	£0.50
Smoking on the Pitch	£0.50
Drinking on the Pitch	£0.50
Missed Stumping	£0.50
Missed Run-Out	£0.50
Fines' Folder Abuse	£0.50
Impersonating Billy Liar	£0.50
Having a Major Cob	£0.50
Having a Parkinson’s Cob (utter meltdown)	£1.00
Uber [anything] – particularly arrogant, smug or condescending	£0.50
Extreme [anything] – particularly Frowning	£0.50
Insulting the Fines Committee Chairman	£1.00
Insolvency / Unemployment (maximum limit) Known as the “Dobner Clause”	£1.00
Swearing in Front of Kids	£2.50
Bringing the Club into Disrepute (Ruled on by the Captain)	£5.00
Dissent (to On-field Umpires)	£5.00
Mongoose Multiplier (out using Goose)	x2