“Keep Your Enemies Close; But Not Too Close You Idiot,

They Might Have Covid”

Match: 21 / 553

Won by 7 wkts

Team	Total
Wootton & Bladon CC	122 - 5
J. Harris 2 - 9, M. Rundle 2 - 17
FFTMCC	126 - 3
R. Hadfield 30*, I. Howarth 29*

“In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.” John 16:16 – The Bible

“I’m number 74.” John 74 – FFTMCC

In truth, both those quotes could easily be attributable to our languid West Midlands off-spinner who went AWOL for many a year. The first quote could just as easily be from the mouth of Lucan, to whom John was responding in the second one: Lucan was trying to figure out how old he was in Mad terms. It was one of those days, a relaxed day of cricket ripe for reminiscing. The Hundred may well have caught the imagination of the yoof but on this day, FFTMCC and West Bladon would find a new format much more agreeable to them, the uh non-yoof. Namely, ‘have a sit/lie down and put your feet up whenever you want’.

“Right lads, not many of us here today, so let’s get this sorted.”

With various members of the West Bladon massive otherwise engaged – banger racing, embracing Covid, tending to one’s kissed-free face – rumours swirled over how many players they could muster. SEVEN!!! It was seven. Later to be eight. No one ever really wants to play for the oppo so after losing the toss and being asked to field Timms decided that if The MAD fielded with 10 for 35 overs then have West Bladon one it would be 9 vs 10 – which seemed much fairer than 8 vs 11. Rudimentary maths told Timms that if most of The MAD ranks sat out 4 overs but then fielded for West Bladon for 4 overs that they would field for… minus the 4, carry the 1… yep, the allotted 35 overs anyhow. Everyone seemed okay with this. Obviously, it didn’t work like this. Young James Bateman fielding the full 35 for FFTMCC as well as 4 or 5 overs for West Bladon. S’what you get for being young, innit.

Rundle powers past Hambridge to deliver a 30mph rocket….

The depleted West Bladon set about their task well before N Hambridge (23) was caught behind one-handed champagne stylee by J Hotson. Rundle (5-1-17-2) getting himself on the ‘Most Wickets in a Season’ board in the process. Kudos, and thoroughly deserved. Steve ‘Charvis’ Edwards entertained hugely with his sparkling 3 runs. Buying him a pint in the pub beforehand seemed to have done the trick. Or was that just how he bats? A Hambridge (39*) and McDonough (16) settled things down before Harris (5-0-9-2) snared a couple. Williams attempted to concuss Howarth in the field, much to everyone’s delight, whilst Mike let seven hundred balls past him at gully. Even the oppo began barracking him. He kept letting them past him whilst putting his feet up for four overs too. Unbelievable. Because, like, it didn’t really happen. Poole (23) provided some impetus but tidy bowling elsewhere nearly left Howarth with an incredibly harsh buffet award – going at 3.83 per over. However, as is likely to become custom in this fixture, West Bladon tucked into their former player J Bateman (2-0-14-0). James was unlucky not to walk away with a wicket mind. Oops.

Tea was probably less relaxed than the previous 35 overs had been, with arguments over flapjack consistency punctuated by a frustrating lack of wickets at Lords. Kate, those were top 5, easily. The MAD were chasing 123 for victory. Easy as… Nah, nothing ever is with The MAD. Skipper Timms would selflessly offer to do his 4 over stint for the oppo first up. Having dropped Poole snr off the bowling of Bateman is seemed only really that he should shell one at slip for the oppo. Net drops = zero, right? Russ (6) was happy anyway. Until the following over. In fairness, it was a decent catch from N Hambridge rather than anything stupid from R Turner. Williams (14) holed out to A Hambridge a few overs later, but The MAD had a solid platform, 38-2, and more importantly another 28 overs to bat.

Turner chats to Williams as the umpire puts out his dirty laundry.

R Hadfield (30*) anchored the innings whilst J Bateman (24) had a huge amount of fun the other end. Edwards’ eyes lit up at the chance to bowl to Judas Bateman. James, it’s James. Two wides. Dot. Dot. Would James take the bait, man? Short and wide, four. Full, too full, four. Short and wide, four. ‘Angered’, Edwards reverted to the long, long run up… Short and wide, four. 18 off the over. 62-2 after 10. In fairness to Edwards (4-0-24-0) he pulled it round nicely after that. James would tickle his leg stump with his heel off the bowling of Collett (3-0-27-1) a few overs later to bring I Howarth in.

Howarth (29*) would caress (tonk) three 4’s off his first three balls and with the score approaching 100 The MAD side-line began to relax. No. 11 Corne throwing caution to the wind and getting changed. He wasn’t going to bat anyway given it was 9 vs 10. Sssshh, don’t tell him. Opening bowlers McDonough (6.4-0- 38-1) and Trinder (6-1-22-1) returned to try and sway the game towards West Bladon, but a stoic Hadfield and belligerent Howarth would see The MAD to their target of 123 after 19.4 overs.

Hotson shows Russ how to score correctly (i.e not 10 runs short)

Huge credit to our old foes for going ahead with the game despite their lack of numbers. Previous needle in this fixture has been replaced by a cordial and friendly rivalry, albeit still pockmarked with acerbic barbs. Perhaps, as one gets older, and their body can no longer do what they want it to, a new perspective arrives? West Bladon takes the season’s spoils 2-1 by virtue of being slight less shit. Well done to them.

Oh, and by the way, Lucan is old in MAD terms.

‘S. Kipper’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far from the MCC versus Wootton & Bladon CC Played at Cassington, 15 August 2021 Wootton & Bladon CC won the toss and elected to bat Far from the MCC won by 7 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: n/a

21 / 553 35 over match

Team	Wootton & Bladon CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	A. Hambridge	not out	39		4	-	-
2	N. Hambridge *	c Hotson b Rundle	23		2	-	31-1
3	S. Edwards	c Harris b Rundle	3		-	-	35-2
4	J. MacDonough	b Harris	16		2	-	65-3
5	G. Doggett †	c Bateman b Harris	1		-	-	67-4
6	S. Poole	run out (Bateman/Vermaak)	23		3	-
7	A. Collett	not out	2		-	-	-
8	J. Trinder
9
10
11
	Extras	NB2, W8, B5	15
	TOTAL	(for 5 wickets. 35 overs)	122

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	Reeves	4	0	13	0	3.25
2	Rundle	5	1	17	2	3.40
3	Howarth	6	0	23	0	3.83
4	Vermaak	5	2	17	0	3.40
5	Harris	5	0	9	2	1.80
6	Timms	4	1	11	0	2.75
7	Bateman	2	0	14	0	7.00
8	Williams	4	0	13	0	3.25

Team	Far from the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	R. P. Turner	c N. Hambridge b Trinder	6	(13)	-	-	1-24
2	C. T. J. Williams	c A. Hambridge b MacDonough	14	(14)	2	-	2-38
3	R. J. T. Hadfield	not out	30	(44)	2	-	-
4	J. C. Bateman	hit wicket b Collett	24	(31)	4	-	3-80
5	I. Howarth	not out	29	(16)	5	-	-
6	G. J. Timms *
7	J. Harris
8	M. K. Reeves
9	M. S. Rundle
10	J. C. W. Hotson †
11	C. J. Vermaak
	Extras	W8, LB3, B12	23
	TOTAL	(for 3 wickets, 19.4 overs)	126

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	MacDonough	6.4	0	38	1	5.70
2	Trinder	6	1	22	1	3.67
3	Edwards	4	0	24	0	6.00
4	Collett	3	0	27	1	9.00

MOTM: R. J. B. Hadfield Champagne Moment: J. C. W. Hotson’s one handed catch as keeper Buffet Award: J. C. Bateman’s country loaf with soup side MAD Moment: C. T. J. Williams throwing the ball back to keeper via I. Howarth’s head

Opposition: V027 / 34 Ground: G067 / 07 Captain: C022 / 109 Match No: 35 / 202